Injected senses.

Giving up, Was only two words. But the feeling was indescribable.

what do you feel?

I feel my heavy eyes torturing itself for good use, forcing liquidity
to explain my inner outburst that speech itself couldn’t embody.

I feel there is nowhere else to turn to, I can’t move the way I want, I cant
make a sound even when it rains, I cant show expression but to slap myself
quietly till my remains go back to my old numb self.

I feel I can’t feel, speak, express, think or talk any way I’m able to the extent
feeling angry only left me bruising my own welfare to reduce the music of aggression.

I feel I can cry anytime I want, cause I’ve accumulated enough, the weather could
change as quick as lightning when there are factors before affecting it.

I feel my movements change by instinct without my permission, both hands locked
gripping tight awaiting for no such savior , a slight hope for me to part from
everyplace into nothingness. Please leave me be, please.

I feel my eyebrows unease in a permanent fixture that explains
everything my words couldn’t exploit.

I feel laying here all this longest while has been the only way, yet the worst.

I feel I cant speak without my mind extracting claws behind my head
to scratch away the exterior to reach within.

It hurts.

And if I could put emotion into words, this page would bleed.

If I were to speak without trying, this page would be drenched.

And if I were to share anything of this face to any,
my privileges to function would be taken away.

How are you?

My eyes blinks a couple more than usual to water the sting within my eyes.

My wrist are cramped from forcing sorrow into aggression onto solidity.

My brain is empty enough it took me a long while to realize I’m in my worst shape.

My leg is heavily bruised and numb, so thick as though something is growing underneath.

My mind says rest but my body wont let it. Slowly, my body itself will serve as “them” to act as my boundary to live the way many forbid. If this is adaptation, I wish for my disobedient heartless self back.

I need you back, well being. Its either you or the opposite.

time is running out.

Grant me. Will.